“If a parent can love more than one child; then a child can love more than one parent.” Judith Land, Author of the book Adoption Detective: Memoir of an Adopted Child
Why did you write a book about adoption?
Media, social workers, parents and adoptees encouraged me to write a book.
Audiences showed high enthusiasm for my story around campfires and dinner tables.
The topic of adoption has universal appeal for individuals of all ages and cultures.
I was passionate about the need to discover my true self-identity and family heritage.
I wanted to share my ideas with others who could benefit from my experience.
To prove to others that negative beginnings can have positive outcomes.
I wanted to speak for those without a voice and inspire others to take action.
It is important to leave a legacy and make others proud of me.
What makes your book Adoption Detective unique?
It describes the evolution in thinking over time from childhood through to adulthood.
It is written from the perspective of an orphaned, fostered and adopted child.
It describes the universal spiritual connection to mothers and my passion to find her.
It captures emotional reactions to the pivotal events in the life of an adoptee.
It highlights the power of the individual to overcome obstacles and determine outcomes.
It proves that destiny is not always preordained—life is an adventure of our own making.
What outcomes can readers of your book expect?
Readers will be entertained and carried along by many of their own experiences.
Awareness of adoption issues on all sides of the adoption triangle will increase.
More birth mothers and fathers will be inspired to keep in touch with their babies.
Orphans, foster children, and adoptees will be inspired to search for their roots.
Parents will be inspired to do a better job of raising their children.
Parents will become more aware that children are forever and always.
The public will pay more attention to adoption legislation, laws and policies.
Charitable giving to children’s organizations will increase.
How would you describe your writing style?
Writing styles serve as a brand similar to a favorite ice cream flavor. Adoption Detective is a true story that blends the elements of a nonfiction memoir with the written style of a novel. Novels highlight individuals that have reasons for their actions, who are distinguished, alluring, and realistic, that the reader wants to know more about. The theme is profound and the setting, time, and place easy to imagine. A good memoir deals with desire–what people want; what they do to get it; what helps or hinders them; and describes what it all means then and now. Pivotal events in life are specific and interesting and the interrelationship of events and feelings are vividly linked based on the cause and effect. I combined elements of both formats to keep the story lively and interesting.
Would you advise other adoptees to search for their roots?
Yes. With increasing age and maturity most adoptees think of their birth parents with an ever-increasing sense of forgiveness. Adoptees have a need for a curative breakthrough reality that will finally make sense of their disrupted life stories. Adoption reunions have the potential to make seekers well in this age of illness and anxiety. Adoptees eventually grow up to be mature adults with their own opinions and ideas, but many adoptive parents who oppose adoption reunions may disagree with me because they believe that adoptees are “forever” children in need of lifelong supervision. Adoption searches may create feelings of jealousy and be viewed as self-serving by adoptive parents withholding their emotional support.
Do you encourage adoptions?
Safeguarding the mental and emotional well being of children should be a universal priority for humanity in all cultures and societies. I have compassion for mothers and fathers separated from their babies who endure countless anxious days and nights of tormented suffering. For the infant, separation from the birth mother is a confiscation of a child’s soul, a mutual occurrence that rips apart and exposes the primal heart of the child. The traumatic tribulations that haunt afflicted unwanted children, selflessly orphaned, abandoned, clueless and left to be raised by strangers can cause highly severe and predictable negative lifelong psychological effects. It is difficult to keep up with all the discussions about the longterm effects of primal wounds and PTSD related to adoptions. All children feel the need to be loved. For that reason, I view the permanence associated with adoption as far superior to orphanages and institutional care when it comes to safeguarding the mental and emotional well being of children in need of parents, but adoption should only be viewed as a desperate last resort. I much prefer, whenever possible, that children stay with their biological relatives.
What was it like to meet your birth parents?
I find it difficult to find the appropriate words to describe the enigmatic, mystifying, and passionate psychological potency that motivates some adoptees hoping to reunite with their roots in order to discover their true self-identity and natural place on this earth. The way home for many adoptees is a highly emotional journey through the government bureaucracy and a mysterious labyrinth of the mind and soul. Once a quest to discover one’s roots has been initiated, it is often difficult for seekers and wanderers to change course, or halt the pursuit of their goal, until a conclusion has been reached. It was a difficult emotional journey for me, but the rewards of finding my birth parents and extended family far outweighs the trauma, apprehension, and mental angst I experienced along the way. I also conducted additional searches to find my foster parents and maternal grandparents, which were great adventures and just as exciting and rewarding. Adoptive parents are often opposed to reunions, usually for selfish reasons, but the most important thing I learned from my adoption search is, “If a parent can love more than one child; then a child can love more than one parent.”
What do you have to say in conclusion?
The positive feedback I have received from all over the world is hugely rewarding. Knowing that I have made a positive contribution to the lives of others in search of their true identity is very important to me. It is gratifying to hear readers thank me for being their voice on many difficult issues by leading through example, inspiration, and entertainment. Every new generation of unskilled adolescents needs to be forewarned of the perils and heartbreaks of exerting their desire to experience love. We learn by reading. And in conclusion, I would like to say that those who don’t read have no advantage over those who can’t.
Judith Land, Author & Adoptee
Adoption Detective: Memoir of an Adopted Child