Many adoptees are preoccupied with deep thoughts of past events that are regrettable. They are prone to laying face down, talking to themselves, crying in pain and praying in solitude. When their emotional lows are lower than the highs and the negative influences in their life far outweigh the positives, most often it is because someone is missing in their life—a parent, a sibling, a friend, or a person of trust. When they experience homesickness, lonesomeness and isolation they are naturally drawn to songs, poems, and love stories that introspectively reflect their own feelings.
In this age of Facebook, Twitter, Linked-in, Pinterest, YouTube, Tumbler, Instagram, dozens of social dating apps and social networking sites, casual writing is at an all time high. Computers allow anyone to put themselves out there in crazy ways with no restraints. Modern communication has shifted entirely toward the informal and the difference between creepy and romantic has become entirely hazy. Casual communication without much thought often occurs by chance. Lacking a high degree of interest or devotion and showing little concern, intent or commitment, social conveyance of ideas is often insensitive to the feelings of others. We seldom write in cursive anymore and pay little attention to the real meanings of words, classic literature, poetry and quality writing. The social fears of ostracism, criticism and misunderstandings prevent adoptees from taking action or saying how they really feel and when they don’t express themselves clearly, what they intended to say isn’t always how others interpret their words.
In this modern era, it is safer, far quicker and easier to communicate with abbreviations, emoji, and acronyms than it is to take the time to thoroughly compose our thoughts, transmit our ideas, and clearly express ourselves from the heart. We are reluctant to use poetry to express a yearning for love and communicate our sentiments with the words of a song because we fear what others may think. Poetry is an inherently dramatic method of communicating tangled abstract thoughts and simple expressions of complex ideas. Songs stir our emotions, make perception inevitable, and leave residual feelings of satisfaction as understanding merges into appreciation. In this world of text messaging and emails, good old-fashioned handwritten love letters have become very rare special treats. I cherish ancient love letters, poems and songs that cinematically paint images with words that clearly project the personal thoughts, perspectives and experiences of the writer to convey eternal messages of love and hope—memories of a bygone era recorded somewhere in time in handwritten script on parchment paper and encapsulated in a faded envelope.
Writing is therapy for many adoptees. When reminiscing about the past or thinking about someone who is missing, choose your words carefully. Be creative in word and thought. If you are uncertain how to begin, find a good quote. Don’t worry about the length of your message. A few simple sentences are often best when speaking from the heart. Don’t be concerned about what the handwriting looks like. The message is more important than the format. Don’t be afraid to open up. Regardless of the method chosen, the aim should always be to reveal the truth and use the meaning of your words to create understanding. If you are an adoptee separated from your mother, or someone very dear to you that is missing, perhaps this is a good time to let them know how you are truly feeling in a poem, a song, or a love letter?