“Adoption and self-identity—trying to make sense of one’s life”

“I was surprised to learn that I had been nefariously issued false birth and baptismal certificates when I was adopted to conceal my true identity and prevent me from ever reuniting with my birth parents.” —Judith Land

Striving for well being and making sense of one’s life is at the core of human nature. Knowing your genealogical history is an inalienable and entitled right of every person that has far-reaching implications for behavior, motivation and relationships. The loss of this tradition is a deprivation, which may result in the stunting of emotional development. Life goals develop and are influenced by our perceptions of what is feasible based on our uniqueness, individuality, character, temperament, talents and self-identity. Awareness of self increases consciousness and comprehension and affects how one’s progress toward future goals are evaluated, monitored and pursued. Knowledge is essential for grasping the significance of historical events, deciphering the narrative, and unraveling the backstory. The closer one is to their ideal self and reality, the happier they will be.

Judith Land | Adoption Detective | Self-identity

Awareness and knowledge of our special skills and abilities; physical characteristics and athleticism; scholastic competence and academic performance; and unique talents are the foundation of goal setting, ambition, and the discovery of our purpose in life. Self-esteem and happiness are the result of achieving our expected value, aspirations, and making our dreams come true.

Library shelves are filled with books on personality, cognitive development, sociology, family studies, anthropology, neuroscience and psychology. The conscious recognition of the self as having a unique identity, skills, abilities, hobbies, behavior conduct, romantic appeal, and physical appearance are the basis for the emergence of a true self-identity. Every individual has a unique character, personality, distinctiveness, uniqueness, disposition, humor, temperament, and independence. Fundamentally, self-understanding is the ability to understand the motives behind one’s own actions and reactions. It is a necessary condition for developing a true sense of one’s inner being, soul, and character—but what happens at maturity when an adoptee comes to the realization that they are merely an actor on the stage of life, an impostor wearing someone else’s clothes, and playing the role of a person they were forced to be?

“Adoptees suffering from the stress of genealogical bewilderment have difficulty knowing who they really are because they have no basis for assessing their own potential. The development of selfhood is a crucial building block for self-esteem and respect but an adoptee’s struggle to achieve a comprehensible and consistent backstory that makes sense of a disrupted life is often a daunting task when deviant elements of the past and evidence of a major crossroads in the rear view mirror are absent. Ultimately, a sense of continuity of a coherent past and a present that is consistent and understood are essential components of the process of identity formation.” —Judith Land

Judith Land

 

 

 

Thông qua câu chuyện | Thông qua Reunion | phả hệ hoang mang

About Judith Land

Judith Land lives in Colorado and Arizona with husband and coauthor Martin Land. Judith is a former nurse, retail shop owner, college instructor and avid outdoor person. Her book "Adoption Detective: Memoir of an Adopted Child" is a true story detailing the journey of Judith Romano, foster child and adoptee, as she discovers fragments of her background, and then sets out to solve the mystery as an adult. "Mothers and fathers everywhere in the world need to understand that children are forever and always." --Judith Land
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17 Responses to “Adoption and self-identity—trying to make sense of one’s life”

  1. lynnemiller says:

    You raise interesting points, Judith. People who are not adopted take their identity for granted. Those of us who are adopted and don’t know anything about our “bio families” have incomplete life stories.

    • Judith Land says:

      Striving for well-being and making sense of one’s life is at the core of human nature. Knowing one’s true identity has far-reaching implications for behavior, motivation, and relationships. Life goals develop and are influenced by our perceptions of what is feasible based on our uniqueness, individuality, character, temperament, talents and self-identity. Conceptions of self affect how one’s progress towards future goals are evaluated, monitored, and pursued. The development of an identity is a crucial building block for self-esteem, and an adoptee’s struggle to achieve a coherent story is often a daunting task. The sense of continuity of a past and present that is consistent and reasonably known is necessary for identity formation. Awareness and knowledge are the basis of self-understanding. The closer one is to their ideal self, the happier they will be. https://judithland.wordpress.com/2013/03/22/self-identity-making-sense-of-ones-life-judith-land-adoption-detective/

    • Judith Land says:

      Knowing your genealogical history is the inalienable and entitled right of every person. There is an urge, a call, in everyone to follow and fulfill the tradition of his family, race, nation, and the religious community into which he was born. The loss of this tradition is a deprivation, which may result in the stunting of emotional development. When a true self-identity is lacking many wanders and seekers become prone to falling through the trapdoor of despondency. “Genealogical bewilderment” evokes a nefarious air of uncertainty and befuddles a child’s ability to establish their true self-identity and constitutes a large part of the additional stress that adoptees experience that is not encountered by children raised by their natural parents.

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